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The bellhop glances at Barris's bare ass, looks away. Barris, maybe if you just don't watch the show every night, you wouldn't have to -- BARRIS I always pay for the damn tv's, don't I? BELLHOP It's -- Yes, you do, sir, and we appreciate that -- It's just that there've been complaints from some of the other guests, and Mr. And while we want to accommodate you -- we certainly value your patronage -- there is an issue of customer safety. Suddenly Barris punches himself in the head, flops down on the unmade bed. BELLHOP Well, the people in 917 found a bullet lodged in their wall. ACTUAL BARRIS When you're young, your potential is infinite. Barris walks through a small vegetable garden as he talks, occasionally adjusting a stake or pulling out a weed. CAB - CONTINUOUS Looking in his rearview mirror, the cab driver checks out his passenger: a sweaty young man in a gold blazer with a "P" insignia over his breast pocket. The young man is immersed in the scrawled list he clutches in his hand. GONG SHOW An excerpt from The Gong Show (reenacted). We watch a fat man recite Hamlet, punctuating his soliloquy with loud belching noises. Does every fifty year old asshole have the asshole he deserves? Still leaking urine even though I left the toilet ages ago. Does every man have the asshole he deserves by fifty, as well?

The young man gets out, jogs through the rain toward the fluorescent storefront. GONG SHOW Chuck Barris spastically dances on the screen along with Gene Gene the Dancing Machine.

The meter in the cab is at thirty-five dollars and change. Slow motion sparks and shards of glass shoot toward the camera.

Naked Barris, still holding the gun, seems panicked.

Its characters by alphabetic order: c, i, m, n, o, t.

CONFESSIONS OF A DANGEROUS MIND a screenplay by Charlie Kaufman based on CONFESSIONS OF A DANGEROUS MIND an unauthorized biography by Chuck Barris third draft (revised) May 5, 1998 MUSIC IN: OMINOUS ORCHESTRAL TEXT, WHITE ON BLACK: This film is a reenactment of actual events. Barris's private journals, public records, and hundreds of hours of taped interviews. NYC STREET - NIGHT SUBTITLE: NEW YORK CITY, FALL 1981 It's raining. A passing street light momentarily illuminates the list and we glimpse a few of the entries: double-coated waterproof fuse (500 feet); .38 ammo (hollowpoint configuration); potato chips (Lays). Chuck Barris, age 50, hat pulled over his eyes, dances out from the wings to comfort the agitated performer.

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